From Health Care

‘Delay, Deny And Hope You Die’: NFL’s Byzantine Rules Stymie Ex-Players Seeking Health Benefits

But Paul Scott, who worked as the NFL’s benefit plan point person, wants to change that. He’s hoping to help former players through the application process to get the disability benefits they’ve earned. Meanwhile, experts find fault in the way the University of Maryland treated football player Jordan McNair when he suffered from heatstroke, which led to his death.

Concentrated, Intensive Programs Offer Short-Term Alternative To Traditional Weekly Therapy Sessions

Some patients can finish therapy in just a few weeks. The model is gaining popularity because it is proving to be as effective as long-term weekly treatments. In other public health news: vaping, med students, Lyme disease, autism, HPV, toxins in water, work wellness programs and more.

New Algorithm Lets Scientists Better Calculate Person’s Chances Of Getting Five Serious Health Conditions

The researchers are now building a website that will allow anyone to upload genetic data. Users will receive risk scores for heart disease, breast cancer, Type 2 diabetes, chronic inflammatory bowel disease and atrial fibrillation. But scientists emphasize that DNA is not destiny, and that the results don’t account for a healthy diet and exercise.

Activist Investor Icahn Drops Opposition To Cigna-Express Scripts Deal After Advisory Firms Signal Their Support

Billionaire Carl Icahn had called the deal a “$60 billion folly,” but is now walking back his opposition in light of recommendations from Institutional Shareholder Services and Glass Lewis. The latter called the insurer’s offer for the pharmacy benefits manager “both strategically and financially compelling, structured in a reasonable manner from a valuation standpoint for Cigna shareholders.”

Amid Giddiness Over First-Ever Gene-Silencing Drug’s Approval Is An Acknowledgment Of Its Limitations

Right now, the RNAi drug is limited to cells that go through the liver, which is — in relative terms — easy to target. Getting the drug to other tissue, like the skin or brain, is more challenging. “It’s always been the same problem. And it’s delivery, delivery, delivery,” Steven Dowdy, a cancer biologist at the University of California, San Diego’s school of medicine, tells Stat. “It’s always been the 800-pound gorilla in the room.”

Feds Urge States To Encourage Cheaper Plans Off The Exchanges

For those who make too much money to qualify for health insurance subsidies on the individual market, there may be no Goldilocks moment when shopping for a plan. No choice is just right.

A policy with an affordable premium may come with a deductible that’s too high. If the copayments for physician visits are reasonable, the plan may not include their preferred doctors.

These consumers need better options, and in early August federal officials offered a strategy to help bring down costs for them.

The guidance is from the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services, which oversees the insurance marketplaces set up by the Affordable Care Act. CMS is encouraging states to allow the sale of plans outside of those exchanges that don’t incorporate a surcharge insurers started tacking on last year.

Many insurers added the premium surcharges last fall to plans sold on the individual market. It was a response to the Trump administration’s announcement that it would no longer pay the companies for the “cost-sharing reduction” subsidies required under the health law. The subsidies help cover deductibles and other out-of-pocket costs for lower-income consumers who buy marketplace plans.

Insurers typically added the cost to silver-level plans because those are the type of plans that consumers have to buy in order to receive the cost-sharing subsidies. “Silver loading,” as it’s called, added an estimated 10 percent to the cost of those plans, according to the Congressional Budget Office.

People who qualified for federal premium subsidies — those with incomes up to 400 percent of the federal poverty level (about $48,000 for one person or $100,000 for a family of four) — were shielded from the surcharge because their subsidies increased to cover the cost.

But people with higher incomes faced higher premiums. The new guidance is geared to help them.

“It encourages states to encourage silver loading only on the exchange,” said Aviva Aron-Dine, vice president for health policy at the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities.

But some analysts say they’re unsure if the new federal policy will make a difference since states have already implemented similar strategies.

Many states moved last fall to limit silver loading to plans sold on the exchanges, while allowing or, in the case of California, requiring, very similar plans to be sold off the exchanges without the extra premium charge.

Yet CMS’ endorsement of the strategy removes doubts states may have had, said David Anderson, a research associate at Duke University’s Margolis Center for Health Policy who has tracked the issue.

Eighty-three percent of people who bought a plan during the open-enrollment period for 2018 qualified for premium tax credits. The average monthly premium per subsidized enrollee was $639; after accounting for premium tax credits, however, enrollees owed just $89 on average. That amount was 16 percent lower than the monthly premium the year before.

For people who don’t qualify for premium tax credits, the picture is very different. The average monthly premium for 2018 was $522. That total was 28 percent higher than the previous year’s total of $407, according to an analysis by the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities of CMS enrollment data.

In general, federal rules require that insurers charge the same rates for identical qualified health plans that are sold on and off the exchanges. The CMS guidance suggests that the unloaded plans could be tweaked slightly in terms of cost sharing or other variables so that they are not identical to those on the marketplaces.

Tracing what type of coverage is purchased off the exchange is difficult because there is no centralized source. Consumers can buy plans directly from insurers, or they may use a broker or an online web portal. According to one such portal, eHealth, 28 percent of unsubsidized consumers on its site bought silver plans in 2018, while 42 percent bought bronze plans, whose coverage is less generous than silver plans and typically have lower premiums. Conversely, on the exchanges nearly two-thirds of people bought silver plans in 2018 while 29 percent bought bronze plans, according to federal data.

If fewer insurers add the CSR load to silver plans sold off the exchange, those plans may be more affordable next year than they were in 2018, said Cynthia Cox, director of health reform and private insurance at the Kaiser Family Foundation. (Kaiser Health News is an editorially independent program of the foundation.)

“This makes silver plans an option for [unsubsidized] people who wanted to buy a silver plan but might have been pushed off onto a bronze plan,” she said.

Consumers who want to consider off-exchange plans have to find them first. Some experts suggest checking with insurers that are selling on the marketplace in an area, because it’s possible that they’ll also be selling plans off the exchange.

But that’s not a given. A health insurance broker can help people find and evaluate plans sold off the exchange. But experts urge consumers to stay on their toes and make sure they understand whether the plans they’re considering provide comprehensive coverage.

Starting in October, insurers can offer short-term plans with limited benefits that last up to a year.

“Differentiating between the two may not be easy, and the off-exchange unsubsidized market is the target market for short-term plans,” said Anderson.

Please visit khn.org/columnists to send comments or ideas for future topics for the Insuring Your Health column.

Feds Urge States To Encourage Cheaper Plans Off The Exchanges

For those who make too much money to qualify for health insurance subsidies on the individual market, there may be no Goldilocks moment when shopping for a plan. No choice is just right.

A policy with an affordable premium may come with a deductible that’s too high. If the copayments for physician visits are reasonable, the plan may not include their preferred doctors.

These consumers need better options, and in early August federal officials offered a strategy to help bring down costs for them.

The guidance is from the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services, which oversees the insurance marketplaces set up by the Affordable Care Act. CMS is encouraging states to allow the sale of plans outside of those exchanges that don’t incorporate a surcharge insurers started tacking on last year.

Many insurers added the premium surcharges last fall to plans sold on the individual market. It was a response to the Trump administration’s announcement that it would no longer pay the companies for the “cost-sharing reduction” subsidies required under the health law. The subsidies help cover deductibles and other out-of-pocket costs for lower-income consumers who buy marketplace plans.

Insurers typically added the cost to silver-level plans because those are the type of plans that consumers have to buy in order to receive the cost-sharing subsidies. “Silver loading,” as it’s called, added an estimated 10 percent to the cost of those plans, according to the Congressional Budget Office.

People who qualified for federal premium subsidies — those with incomes up to 400 percent of the federal poverty level (about $48,000 for one person or $100,000 for a family of four) — were shielded from the surcharge because their subsidies increased to cover the cost.

But people with higher incomes faced higher premiums. The new guidance is geared to help them.

“It encourages states to encourage silver loading only on the exchange,” said Aviva Aron-Dine, vice president for health policy at the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities.

But some analysts say they’re unsure if the new federal policy will make a difference since states have already implemented similar strategies.

Many states moved last fall to limit silver loading to plans sold on the exchanges, while allowing or, in the case of California, requiring, very similar plans to be sold off the exchanges without the extra premium charge.

Yet CMS’ endorsement of the strategy removes doubts states may have had, said David Anderson, a research associate at Duke University’s Margolis Center for Health Policy who has tracked the issue.

Eighty-three percent of people who bought a plan during the open-enrollment period for 2018 qualified for premium tax credits. The average monthly premium per subsidized enrollee was $639; after accounting for premium tax credits, however, enrollees owed just $89 on average. That amount was 16 percent lower than the monthly premium the year before.

For people who don’t qualify for premium tax credits, the picture is very different. The average monthly premium for 2018 was $522. That total was 28 percent higher than the previous year’s total of $407, according to an analysis by the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities of CMS enrollment data.

In general, federal rules require that insurers charge the same rates for identical qualified health plans that are sold on and off the exchanges. The CMS guidance suggests that the unloaded plans could be tweaked slightly in terms of cost sharing or other variables so that they are not identical to those on the marketplaces.

Tracing what type of coverage is purchased off the exchange is difficult because there is no centralized source. Consumers can buy plans directly from insurers, or they may use a broker or an online web portal. According to one such portal, eHealth, 28 percent of unsubsidized consumers on its site bought silver plans in 2018, while 42 percent bought bronze plans, whose coverage is less generous than silver plans and typically have lower premiums. Conversely, on the exchanges nearly two-thirds of people bought silver plans in 2018 while 29 percent bought bronze plans, according to federal data.

If fewer insurers add the CSR load to silver plans sold off the exchange, those plans may be more affordable next year than they were in 2018, said Cynthia Cox, director of health reform and private insurance at the Kaiser Family Foundation. (Kaiser Health News is an editorially independent program of the foundation.)

“This makes silver plans an option for [unsubsidized] people who wanted to buy a silver plan but might have been pushed off onto a bronze plan,” she said.

Consumers who want to consider off-exchange plans have to find them first. Some experts suggest checking with insurers that are selling on the marketplace in an area, because it’s possible that they’ll also be selling plans off the exchange.

But that’s not a given. A health insurance broker can help people find and evaluate plans sold off the exchange. But experts urge consumers to stay on their toes and make sure they understand whether the plans they’re considering provide comprehensive coverage.

Starting in October, insurers can offer short-term plans with limited benefits that last up to a year.

“Differentiating between the two may not be easy, and the off-exchange unsubsidized market is the target market for short-term plans,” said Anderson.

Please visit khn.org/columnists to send comments or ideas for future topics for the Insuring Your Health column.

Listen: The Latest On Workplace Wellness Programs

Kaiser Health News senior correspondent Julie Appleby joins a discussion on Cleveland’s WCLV about current thinking on workplace wellness programs.

In Ohio, Republican gubernatorial candidate Mike DeWine is pushing a Cleveland Clinic-inspired wellness plan for Ohio’s Medicaid population. Appleby outlines how these wellness plans have historically functioned, their pros, cons and the recent regulatory developments around them. (The wellness segment begins around 15:10.)

And if you are interested in this subject, here is a sampling of Julie Appleby’s coverage:

Final EEOC Rule Sets Limits For Financial Incentives On Wellness Programs (5/17/16)

Feds Issue Proposed Rule On Health Information Collected By Workplace Wellness Programs (10/29/15)

Workplace Wellness Programs: Early Alarm For Workers’ Health Or A Recipe For Over-Testing? (10/5/15)

Privacy Advocates Urge Stronger Protection Of Employee Health Data (9/30/15)

7 Questions To Ask Your Employer About Wellness Privacy  (9/30/15)

When Does Workplace Wellness Become Coercive? (6/24/15)

Listen: The Latest On Workplace Wellness Programs

Kaiser Health News senior correspondent Julie Appleby joins a discussion on Cleveland’s WCLV about current thinking on workplace wellness programs.

In Ohio, Republican gubernatorial candidate Mike DeWine is pushing a Cleveland Clinic-inspired wellness plan for Ohio’s Medicaid population. Appleby outlines how these wellness plans have historically functioned, their pros, cons and the recent regulatory developments around them. (The wellness segment begins around 15:10.)

And if you are interested in this subject, here is a sampling of Julie Appleby’s coverage:

Final EEOC Rule Sets Limits For Financial Incentives On Wellness Programs (5/17/16)

Feds Issue Proposed Rule On Health Information Collected By Workplace Wellness Programs (10/29/15)

Workplace Wellness Programs: Early Alarm For Workers’ Health Or A Recipe For Over-Testing? (10/5/15)

Privacy Advocates Urge Stronger Protection Of Employee Health Data (9/30/15)

7 Questions To Ask Your Employer About Wellness Privacy  (9/30/15)

When Does Workplace Wellness Become Coercive? (6/24/15)

‘No One Is Ever Really Ready’: Aid-In-Dying Patient Chooses His Last Day

In the end, it wasn’t easy for Aaron McQ to decide when to die.

The 50-year-old Seattle man — a former world traveler, triathlete and cyclist — learned he had leukemia five years ago, followed by an even grimmer diagnosis in 2016: a rare form of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or ALS.

An interior and urban designer who legally changed his given name, McQ had been in pain and physical decline for years. Then the disease threatened to shut down his ability to swallow and breathe.

“It’s like waking up every morning in quicksand,” McQ said. “It’s terrifying.”

Last fall, McQ decided to use Washington state’s 2009 Death With Dignity law to end his suffering. The practice, approved in seven states and the District of Columbia, allows people with a projected six months or less to live to obtain lethal drugs to end their lives.

Although the option was legal, actually carrying it out was difficult for McQ, who agreed to discuss his deliberations with Kaiser Health News. He said he hoped to shed light on an often secretive and misunderstood practice.

“How does anyone get their head around dying?” he said, sitting in a wheelchair in his Seattle apartment in late January.

Aaron McQ speaks during an interview in his Seattle apartment in January. “No one is ever really ready to die,” McQ said. “There will always be a reason not to.”(Dan DeLong for KHN)

More than 3,000 people in the U.S. have chosen such deaths since Oregon’s law was enacted in 1997, according to state reports. Even as similar statutes have expanded to more venues — including, this year, Hawaii — it has remained controversial.

California’s End of Life Option Act, which took effect in 2016, was suspended for three weeks this spring after a court challenge, leaving hundreds of dying patients briefly in limbo.

Supporters say the practice gives patients control over their own fate in the face of a terminal illness. Detractors — including religious groups, disability rights advocates and some doctors — argue that such laws could put pressure on vulnerable people and that proper palliative care can ease end-of-life suffering.

Thin and wan, with silver hair and piercing blue eyes, McQ still could have passed for the photographer’s model he once was. But McQ’s legs shook involuntarily beneath his dark jeans and his voice was hoarse with pain during a three-hour effort to tell his story.

Last November, doctors told McQ he had six months or less to live. The choice, he said, became not death over a healthy life, but a “certain outcome” now over a prolonged, painful — and “unknowable” — end.

“I’m not wanting to die,” he said. “I’m very much alive, yet I’m suffering. And I would rather have it not be a surprise.”

In late December, a friend picked up a prescription for 100 tablets of the powerful sedative secobarbital. For weeks, the bottle holding the lethal dose sat on a shelf in his kitchen.

“I was not relaxed or confident until I had it in my cupboard,” McQ said.

At the time, he intended to take the drug in late February. Or maybe mid-March. He had wanted to get past Christmas, so he didn’t ruin anyone’s holiday. Then his sister and her family came for a visit. Then there was a friend’s birthday and another friend’s wedding.

“No one is ever really ready to die,” McQ said. “There will always be a reason not to.”

In late December, a friend picked up Aaron McQ’s prescription for 100 tablets of the powerful sedative secobarbital. For weeks, the bottle holding the lethal dose sat on a shelf in his kitchen.(Dan DeLong for KHN)

Many people who opt for medical aid-in-dying are so sick that they take the drugs as soon as they can, impatiently enduring state-mandated waiting periods to obtain the prescriptions

Data from Oregon show that the median time from first request to death is 48 days, or about seven weeks. But it has ranged from two weeks to more than 2.7 years, records show.

Neurodegenerative diseases like ALS are particularly difficult, said Dr. Lonny Shavelson, a Berkeley, Calif., physician who has supervised nearly 90 aid-in-dying deaths in that state and advised more than 600 patients since 2016.

“It’s a very complicated decision week to week,” he said. “How do you decide? When do you decide? We don’t let them make that decision alone.”

Philosophically, McQ had been a supporter of aid-in-dying for years. He was the final caregiver for his grandmother, Milly, who he said begged for death to end pain at the end of her life.

By late spring, McQ’s own struggle was worse, said Karen Robinson, McQ’s health care proxy and friend of two decades. He was admitted to home hospice care, but continued to decline. When a nurse recommended that McQ transfer to a hospice facility to control his growing pain, he decided he’d rather die at home.

Aaron McQ and his friend Karen Robinson go boating on Seattle’s Portage Bay in 2013, before he fell ill with leukemia and a rare form of ALS, or amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.(Courtesy of Karen Robinson)

“There was part of him that was hoping there were some other alternative,” Robinson said.

McQ considered several dates — and then changed his mind, partly because of the pressure that such a choice imposed.

“I don’t want to talk about it because I don’t want to feel like, now you gotta,” he said.

Along with the pain, the risk of losing the physical ability to administer the medication himself, a legal requirement, was growing.

“I talked with him about losing his window of opportunity,” said Gretchen DeRoche, a volunteer with the group End of Life Washington, who said she has supervised hundreds of aid-in-dying deaths.

Finally, McQ chose the day: April 10. Robinson came over early in the afternoon, as she had often done, to drink coffee and talk — but not about his impending death.

“There was a part of him that didn’t want it to be like this is the day,” she said.

DeRoche arrived exactly at 5:30 p.m., per McQ’s instructions. At 6 p.m., McQ took anti-nausea medication. Because the lethal drugs are so bitter, there is some chance patients won’t keep them down.

Four close friends gathered, along with Robinson. They sorted through McQ’s CDs, trying to find appropriate music.

“He put on Marianne Faithfull. She’s amazing, but, it was too much,” Robinson said. “Then he put on James Taylor for, like, 15 seconds. It was ‘You’ve Got a Friend.’ I vetoed that. I said, ‘Aaron, you cannot do that if you want us to hold it together.’”

DeRoche went into a bedroom to open the 100 capsules of 100-milligram secobarbital, one at a time, a tedious process. Then she mixed the drug with coconut water and some vodka.

Just then, McQ started to cry, DeRoche said. “I think he was just kind of mourning the loss of the life he had expected to live.”

After that, he said he was ready. McQ asked everyone but DeRoche to leave the room. She told him he could still change his mind.

“I said, as I do to everyone: ‘If you take this medication, you’re going to go to sleep and you are not going to wake up,’” she recalled.

McQ drank half the drug mixture, paused and drank water. Then he swallowed the rest.

His friends returned, but remained silent.

“They just all gathered around him, each one touching him,” DeRoche said.

Very quickly, just before 7:30 p.m., it was over.

“It was just like one fluid motion,” DeRoche said. “He drank the medication, he went to sleep and he died in six minutes. I think we were all a little surprised he was gone that fast.”

The friends stayed until a funeral home worker arrived.

“Once we got him into the vehicle, she asked, ‘What kind of music does he like?’” Robinson recalled. “It was just such a sweet, human thing for her to say. He was driving away, listening to jazz.”

McQ’s friends gathered June 30 in Seattle for a “happy memories celebration” of his life, Robinson said. She and a few others kayaked out into Lake Washington and left McQ’s ashes in the water, along with rose petals.

In the months since her friend’s death, Robinson has reflected on McQ’s decision to die. It was probably what he expected, she said, but not anything that he desired.

“It’s really tough to be alive and then not be alive because of your choice,” she said.

“If he had his wish, he would have died in his sleep.” 

‘No One Is Ever Really Ready’: Aid-In-Dying Patient Chooses His Last Day

In the end, it wasn’t easy for Aaron McQ to decide when to die.

The 50-year-old Seattle man — a former world traveler, triathlete and cyclist — learned he had leukemia five years ago, followed by an even grimmer diagnosis in 2016: a rare form of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or ALS.

An interior and urban designer who legally changed his given name, McQ had been in pain and physical decline for years. Then the disease threatened to shut down his ability to swallow and breathe.

“It’s like waking up every morning in quicksand,” McQ said. “It’s terrifying.”

Last fall, McQ decided to use Washington state’s 2009 Death With Dignity law to end his suffering. The practice, approved in seven states and the District of Columbia, allows people with a projected six months or less to live to obtain lethal drugs to end their lives.

Although the option was legal, actually carrying it out was difficult for McQ, who agreed to discuss his deliberations with Kaiser Health News. He said he hoped to shed light on an often secretive and misunderstood practice.

“How does anyone get their head around dying?” he said, sitting in a wheelchair in his Seattle apartment in late January.

Aaron McQ speaks during an interview in his Seattle apartment in January. “No one is ever really ready to die,” McQ said. “There will always be a reason not to.”(Dan DeLong for KHN)

More than 3,000 people in the U.S. have chosen such deaths since Oregon’s law was enacted in 1997, according to state reports. Even as similar statutes have expanded to more venues — including, this year, Hawaii — it has remained controversial.

California’s End of Life Option Act, which took effect in 2016, was suspended for three weeks this spring after a court challenge, leaving hundreds of dying patients briefly in limbo.

Supporters say the practice gives patients control over their own fate in the face of a terminal illness. Detractors — including religious groups, disability rights advocates and some doctors — argue that such laws could put pressure on vulnerable people and that proper palliative care can ease end-of-life suffering.

Thin and wan, with silver hair and piercing blue eyes, McQ still could have passed for the photographer’s model he once was. But McQ’s legs shook involuntarily beneath his dark jeans and his voice was hoarse with pain during a three-hour effort to tell his story.

Last November, doctors told McQ he had six months or less to live. The choice, he said, became not death over a healthy life, but a “certain outcome” now over a prolonged, painful — and “unknowable” — end.

“I’m not wanting to die,” he said. “I’m very much alive, yet I’m suffering. And I would rather have it not be a surprise.”

In late December, a friend picked up a prescription for 100 tablets of the powerful sedative secobarbital. For weeks, the bottle holding the lethal dose sat on a shelf in his kitchen.

“I was not relaxed or confident until I had it in my cupboard,” McQ said.

At the time, he intended to take the drug in late February. Or maybe mid-March. He had wanted to get past Christmas, so he didn’t ruin anyone’s holiday. Then his sister and her family came for a visit. Then there was a friend’s birthday and another friend’s wedding.

“No one is ever really ready to die,” McQ said. “There will always be a reason not to.”

In late December, a friend picked up Aaron McQ’s prescription for 100 tablets of the powerful sedative secobarbital. For weeks, the bottle holding the lethal dose sat on a shelf in his kitchen.(Dan DeLong for KHN)

Many people who opt for medical aid-in-dying are so sick that they take the drugs as soon as they can, impatiently enduring state-mandated waiting periods to obtain the prescriptions

Data from Oregon show that the median time from first request to death is 48 days, or about seven weeks. But it has ranged from two weeks to more than 2.7 years, records show.

Neurodegenerative diseases like ALS are particularly difficult, said Dr. Lonny Shavelson, a Berkeley, Calif., physician who has supervised nearly 90 aid-in-dying deaths in that state and advised more than 600 patients since 2016.

“It’s a very complicated decision week to week,” he said. “How do you decide? When do you decide? We don’t let them make that decision alone.”

Philosophically, McQ had been a supporter of aid-in-dying for years. He was the final caregiver for his grandmother, Milly, who he said begged for death to end pain at the end of her life.

By late spring, McQ’s own struggle was worse, said Karen Robinson, McQ’s health care proxy and friend of two decades. He was admitted to home hospice care, but continued to decline. When a nurse recommended that McQ transfer to a hospice facility to control his growing pain, he decided he’d rather die at home.

Aaron McQ and his friend Karen Robinson go boating on Seattle’s Portage Bay in 2013, before he fell ill with leukemia and a rare form of ALS, or amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.(Courtesy of Karen Robinson)

“There was part of him that was hoping there were some other alternative,” Robinson said.

McQ considered several dates — and then changed his mind, partly because of the pressure that such a choice imposed.

“I don’t want to talk about it because I don’t want to feel like, now you gotta,” he said.

Along with the pain, the risk of losing the physical ability to administer the medication himself, a legal requirement, was growing.

“I talked with him about losing his window of opportunity,” said Gretchen DeRoche, a volunteer with the group End of Life Washington, who said she has supervised hundreds of aid-in-dying deaths.

Finally, McQ chose the day: April 10. Robinson came over early in the afternoon, as she had often done, to drink coffee and talk — but not about his impending death.

“There was a part of him that didn’t want it to be like this is the day,” she said.

DeRoche arrived exactly at 5:30 p.m., per McQ’s instructions. At 6 p.m., McQ took anti-nausea medication. Because the lethal drugs are so bitter, there is some chance patients won’t keep them down.

Four close friends gathered, along with Robinson. They sorted through McQ’s CDs, trying to find appropriate music.

“He put on Marianne Faithfull. She’s amazing, but, it was too much,” Robinson said. “Then he put on James Taylor for, like, 15 seconds. It was ‘You’ve Got a Friend.’ I vetoed that. I said, ‘Aaron, you cannot do that if you want us to hold it together.’”

DeRoche went into a bedroom to open the 100 capsules of 100-milligram secobarbital, one at a time, a tedious process. Then she mixed the drug with coconut water and some vodka.

Just then, McQ started to cry, DeRoche said. “I think he was just kind of mourning the loss of the life he had expected to live.”

After that, he said he was ready. McQ asked everyone but DeRoche to leave the room. She told him he could still change his mind.

“I said, as I do to everyone: ‘If you take this medication, you’re going to go to sleep and you are not going to wake up,’” she recalled.

McQ drank half the drug mixture, paused and drank water. Then he swallowed the rest.

His friends returned, but remained silent.

“They just all gathered around him, each one touching him,” DeRoche said.

Very quickly, just before 7:30 p.m., it was over.

“It was just like one fluid motion,” DeRoche said. “He drank the medication, he went to sleep and he died in six minutes. I think we were all a little surprised he was gone that fast.”

The friends stayed until a funeral home worker arrived.

“Once we got him into the vehicle, she asked, ‘What kind of music does he like?’” Robinson recalled. “It was just such a sweet, human thing for her to say. He was driving away, listening to jazz.”

McQ’s friends gathered June 30 in Seattle for a “happy memories celebration” of his life, Robinson said. She and a few others kayaked out into Lake Washington and left McQ’s ashes in the water, along with rose petals.

In the months since her friend’s death, Robinson has reflected on McQ’s decision to die. It was probably what he expected, she said, but not anything that he desired.

“It’s really tough to be alive and then not be alive because of your choice,” she said.

“If he had his wish, he would have died in his sleep.”